Many parts of Europe are far more enlightened about end of life choices and the compassion that surrounds it. It is horribly sad when we think about young people dying early in their life. Yet when this occurs, we want to have compassionate choice available to us. End of Life choices affect not only elder people but young people too. Below is a link to a full case study and guideline recommendations on how to deal with end of life care, compassion and choices with young people 0-17 with life limiting conditions.
Tag: death
Important End of Life Conversations
This is an all too human story. Having supported my mother and my husband through their end of life choices, I am grateful for the clarity of information that existed between them and me. They were open about their wishes. We had good communication. Many people don’t have these conversations because it creates discomfort for them. Usually, it’s the children who have conflicted issues about discussing the end of life. They don’t want to acknowledge their parents’ deaths. Following that, they have to acknowledge their own death because it is something we all will eventually face.
I remember how difficult it was for me to talk about these issues with my own mother. It took years before I got comfortable with it. The conversations made me feel very sad because I had to face that I would lose her someday. I loved her very much. Nevertheless, I learned so much about end of life issues from her courageous demonstration. She was a teacher to me. She certainly helped me pave the way for clear communication with my husband once he was diagnosed with both Alzheimer’s and laryngeal cancer.
Margot Bentley’s VSED Story
When I presented recently at the first national conference on VSED at Seattle University, Katherine Hammond followed me in the program. She was Margot Bentley’s daughter and Health Agent. She tearfully told a tragic story about how her mother’s Health Directive was not honored in a nursing home. When she could no longer feed herself, she wanted to be able to stop eating and drinking. The nursing home would not allow this to occur. With the Alzheimer’s getting progressively worse, her mother was kept alive for many years until her body turned rigid. There was a police order that prevented her daughter from taking her home where she would be able to not eat and drink and die peacefully. This is what her health directive requested. Sometimes we are grateful for a death. This is one of those times. Margot Bentley finally died at the nursing home in the Vancouver area in Canada. In order to prevent pain from her body becoming rigid, her doctor gave her additional morphine. Then she died.
From Vancouver Sun [PNG Merlin Archive]
If you are interested in how the story has progressed here are the first two articles about the Margot Bentley case:
MEDICINE MATTERS: A family's anguish as nursing home continues feeding vegetative patient
MEDICINE MATTERS: CEO apologizes to family for breach of privacy by care aide in Margot Bentley case